All the Single Ladies: Equal Rites by Sir Terry Pratchett

I have been looking at this stack of books next to my laptop for several days now, putting off writing these reviews. With yesterday's passing of Sir Terry Pratchett, however, I have a new impetus. These certainly aren't the first Discworld books I've read, and definitely won't be the last. But for today, for this Cannonball, and for Sir Terry, I present these next three reviews in memorium.

Book: Equal Rites

Author: Terry Pratchett
Recommended for:  Dyed-in-the-wool feminists, beard fanciers, amateur magicians, and disaffected college students














 Everyone on Discworld knows that wizarding is passed on. It's a grand tradition that the eighth son of an eighth son will receive the magical potential of an aging wizard. This is known. And the wizards of Unseen University in Ankh-Morpork are nothing if not sticklers for tradition.

Imagine the consternation, then, when an aging wizard travels to the distant Ramtop Mountains and the village of Bad Ass to pass his magic to an eighth son just being born only to discover too late that this eighth son is a girl. To further complicate matters, the girl, Eskarina, grows up under the tutelage of Esme "Granny" Weatherwax who trains her in the finer arts of Witchery - which the wizards agree is fine for a woman, but it's not real magic.

The story follows Granny and Esk's adventures as they travel to the University to claim Esk's rightful place among the wizards of that lofty - or maybe just drafty - institution. Sir Terry sends up institutionalized misogyny in his own inimitable style and provides color commentary on a variety of other gender issues along the way. 

The constant charm of the Discworld books remains the fact that serious issues are confronted and scrutinized without sacrificing humor or getting preachy. Equal Rites is yet another shining example of Sir Terry's genius at opening our eyes to society's foibles. His voice is always appreciated, and will be terribly missed. 

Pick up your copy today.

Just a quick note, today.

I've been working on a new project for the last week or two, a wilderness survival website/blog www.howtosurviveinthewilderness.com that's geared towards those with a love for the wilderness but no practical training in survival. My hope is that I can help prevent someone having a simple hike in the woods turn into a tragedy.

I'm excited about where I can see this going. I've got my first post up over there, and I'd appreciate you checking it out: Wilderness Survival Basics: A 4-Step Survival Strategy

Just As You Wished

Book: As You Wish: Inconceivable Tales from the Making of The Princess Bride

Authors: Cary Elwes and Joe Layden
Recommended for:  Pie-in-the-sky romantics, adventurers, pirates, sots, and disaffected college students

If you're a reader of nonfiction books about movies and TV, you've likely run across the frequent disappointment (or delicious schadenfreude) of learning that a cast that thrilled us on the screen absolutely loathed one another off camera. It's a frequent enough tale that I approached this book - featuring one of my most-loved films - with a certain amount of trepidation. With a movie this delightful and a cast that seemed to have such fun together, it would be crushing to find out that it was only smoke and mirrors.

You'll be happy to hear, then, that all was well behind the scenes of "The Princess Bride". Mr. Elwes' retelling of his experiences in gaining the lead role of Westley through to the bittersweet final scene gives the distinct impression that filming the movie was every bit as fun as watching it. Indeed for the cast, paralleling the experiences of the characters, there were moments of danger (and injury), harrowing terror (comes from having an author on set), riotous laughter, travails of all kinds, unconscious giants, and falling in love.

I fear to say more would take away from your delight in hearing Mr. Elwes' stories for yourself. And you should. Without delay. Get it here.

I've Got Your Glass Slipper Right Here, Sister

Book(s):
 Cinderella's Secret Diary: Lost by Ron Vitale
 Cinderella's Secret Diary: Stolen by Ron Vitale
Stars: 3.5
Recommended for: angst-ridden teens with a serious Prince Charming complex,  people who like their fairies with a little more menace, and disaffected college students


Everybody knows the story, right? Girl is a virtual slave...wicked stepmother...ball...fairy godmother...glass slippers...happily ever after...yada, yada, yada. But what happens after the wedding? How happy can ever-after
really be?

This is precisely where the Cinderella's Secret Diary series picks up the story. It seems life hasn't been all roses and sunshine for our mouse-loving, pumpkin-riding princess. In fact, it turns out Prince Charming is something of a rat bastard, and his Royal Mother the Queen doesn't really take a shine to the commoner he's married. When Cinderella is unable to produce an heir in a timely fashion, things go from tolerable to acutely tense around the royal castle.

To escape her misery and the scrutiny of the royal household, Cinderella arranges for a trip to France in spite of the fact that their two countries are on the verge of war. She and her best friend/lady-in-waiting go to live in a magnificent chateau for the Summer, and of course there is the requisite romance.

Up to this point everything in the book has been fairly standard YA fare - better written that Twilight, certainly, but sticking pretty close to the script. During their sojourn in France, however, things take a turn.

Vitale re-imagines our heroine such that she is far removed from the clutches of the Disney Princess marketing machine. I'm going to avoid spoilers at all costs, but I can safely say that the magical world of which Cinderella has already had a small taste comes to bear on her life in a decidedly dark and dangerous way.

For the remainder of Lost and continuing into Stolen, this new world of Vitale's imagining engulfs Cinderella, changing her destiny and forcing her to mature beyond the girl sitting in the cinders and ashes.

I'm not a huge fan of the fantasy genre, and I'm certainly not the target market for YA book series, yet the Cinderella Diaries proved to be an enjoyable experience. I could see this being valuable for girls of a certain age; suggesting to them that the reality of life is rarely a fairy tale experience, and perhaps seeking personal growth and maturity should take precedence over finding their Prince Charming.

I Believe the Children Are the Future: The Genesis of Shannara Trilogy by Terry Brooks

Book:

Armageddon's Children, Terry Brooks

The Elves of Cintra, Terry Brooks

The Gypsy Morph, Terry Brooks

Stars: 2.5

Recommended for:  longtime Terry Brooks readers, survival nuts, people who think ‘Lord of the Rings’ is real, and disaffected college students

I’m beginning to believe that book marketing people are one of the most evil forces on Earth.

You see, I had a plan when I started this Cannonball. That plan lasted exactly one book. The second book on my list wasn’t in our local library, but no big deal. I put in an inter-library loan request and moved on down the list.

Third book on my list - Don Quixote. Have you ever seen an unabridged copy of Don Quixote? It’s massive. It’s roughly the same size as the Oxford English Dictionary. Clearly, this wasn’t a book that I was going to cruise through in a week.

So what’s a Cannonballer who’s faced with an unexpected challenge to do? Well, if he’s at the library, he picks a book off the shelf at random - at least that’s what I did. Keeping my rules for book selection in mind, I tried to find a stand-alone book. I arrived at “Armageddon’s Children” by Terry Brooks. I looked carefully at the jacket - it seemed like everything pointed to this being a good choice. Take it home and let the reading begin.

It wasn’t until I got to page 170 - just shy of halfway through the book - that I began to think I might have made a mistake. It was there that Brooks introduced another major set of characters and a completely different story line. What the what?!?!? There’s no way he can wrap all this up in the rest of the book. So I peek at the last page - normally a taboo for me - and there it is, clear as day. “The story will continue in the next novel.” Aww, son-of-a....

The Genesis of Shannara Trilogy - beginning with “Armageddon’s Children” - tells the story of how “Shannara” got its start. I can only infer what Shanarra is, since the term is never used in the text of the three books. It appears to be some kind of magical land where magical things happen. I’m sure it’s very nice and adventures are had by all.

The setting of the trilogy, on the other hand, is a place nowhere near as nice - a post-apocalyptic, nightmare version of the land formerly known as the United States; specifically the Pacific Northwest. Massive pollution as well as nuclear, chemical, and biological warfare have made most of the land unfit for any form of life. Further, animals and humans that have been exposed to the toxic environment have undergone a series of mutations - populating the world with a variety of monstrous creatures.

And did I mention the world was magical? Yep, yep. Magic abounds in this alternate/future America. On the one hand you have demons, servants of The Void, who seek to complete the utter destruction of life on Earth. On the other hand, you have servants of The Word, Faerie creatures and others that seek to preserve life and oppose the demonic hordes and their armies of “once-men”. Chief players on the front lines of this epic battle: the Knights of the Word - humans who have been chosen to carry the magic of the Word and lead the charge against the forces of the Void.

Our story follows one such Knight - Logan Tom - as he accepts a new assignment from his Faerie “handlers”, the Lady and a Native American named . He is to find a magical creature, called a gypsy morph, which has taken the form of a human child. This creature will lead a group of survivors to a magical stronghold where they will be able to endure the destruction of the rest of the world.

Once Logan is underway on his task of finding the gypsy morph, we’re introduced to yet another Knight of the Word - Angel Perez - who is tasked with finding and protecting a group of Elves. Did I mention this world has Elves? The Elves must find magic stones with which they can save the Elvish nation and carry them to the stronghold which the gypsy morph will show them.

Needless to say, the demon hordes don’t want either Knight to succeed, and so monstrous hunters are sent to stop the Knights and their charges from completing their assigned tasks. Hijinks ensue. Enough to fill around 1000 pages over the course of three books.

That’s right. I ended up reading a story that’s 1000 pages long, all so I could avoid Don Quixote because it was too long. The irony isn’t lost on me.

And it’s not that I’m sorry that I read the Genesis of Shannara Trilogy, it’s just that I wasn’t terribly moved by it. The story was engaging enough. The characters were better than one-dimensional. The plot twists weren’t completely predictable. Generally, it was a well--executed piece of fiction. Yet I still found the entire experience unsatisfying.

The entire Trilogy reads more like a fanboy origins story. Normally, I’m all about the origins story. I stuck with Smallville long after the series jumped the shark, because I’m fascinated by origins stories. Maybe it’s just that to care deeply about the origins of this story, one needs to be deeply immersed in the rest of the Shanarra universe.

I think, ultimately, I felt put out by being taken in by the marketing copy. Nowhere did the book warn me that I was starting a series of books. Clearly they knew. “Armageddon’s Children” just ends. There wasn’t any pretense of wrapping up some of the story lines. It was, quite literally, a cliffhanger. So why didn’t the copy clue the potential reader in to this very basic fact? I blame the marketing folks.